Whenever I get to know someone and I start to like them, I get this feeling… this sort of sense of suspense. Like I’m just waiting for something- anything- to happen. Well I figured out what it is: I’m always waiting for the other shoe to drop.
It’s like this; you get to know someone new and they’re amazing. You start to think to yourself “where have you been all my life?” and you’re just tripping off this new high they bring but what I’ve come to learn (the hard way, no less) is that it doesn’t last. Sure, they might keep you on your toes for weeks- months, even- but eventually, well. The other shoe always drops.
What do I mean by “the other shoe dropping”? Well, you find out they’re not quite as amazing as you’d previously thought. This might come in the form of anything from a fail of epic proportions to some unpleasant information about them or even a more natural cause where the interest just slowly dwindles into nothingness but the effect is more or less the same – the high fades and you’re left at odds with what to make of your relationship with that person.
The thing I’ve realized is that while I used to dread this happening, maybe I ought to look at it as a GOOD thing. Why? Well the way I figure, you don’t really know a person until you’ve witnessed them at their best as well as their worst and “the other shoe dropping” sets the real deals apart from the near-misses. You might delude yourself into believing someone is damn near perfect and this helps you take a step back to properly asses the person for who they really are – hence the “you dodged a bullet” scenario.
But to be able to withstand that initial moment when things go south and still enjoy being around a person despite all their misdemeanors, I should think that’s the hidden blessing behind disillusionment – to know when you’ve found company worth keeping.
So even if the initial high has been exhausted and things are not as exciting as they used to be, getting past that first hurdle allows you to let your relationship evolve into whatever it’s truly meant to be: a lasting friendship, perhaps more.
And that’s pretty cool, isn’t it.